How to make peace with where you are now. (hint: you are not broken)

How to make peace with where you are now. (hint: you are not broken)

This is the biggest struggle I see my clients dealing with: they think they are supposed to arrive at some “enlightened”, perfectly-happy-utopian-place, and reside there all the time.

They think bliss and euphoria are a constant state. They believe they should never make a mistake, or have a negative thought, or be triggered again.

The problem is, we look up to guides, teachers, and thought leaders and put them on pedestals, or make them superhuman. This is especially true in the age of social media where we are seeing snippets of people’s lives.

We hear about their profound insights, and it’s easy to get caught up in the illusion that there is a journey from point A to point B. But, there is no point B, there is only the experience of the journey. We just get to decide how we want this experience to go.

Spirituality, Law of Attraction, and self-help can be a slippery slope into muscling through our mind’s acrobatics; into sidestepping the conditional and relational truths of being human, which leaves us further disconnected from ourselves.

The journey of being a soul having a human experience is about finding our light and our divinity through our humanity, not through escaping it.

The difference is, in transformation, we learn how to be with ourselves instead of avoiding ourselves. We learn how to love ourselves, without relying on the external world to tell us when we are lovable. To that end, perfection is an illusion, and inevitably there will be pivots, shifts, breakdowns, and emptying out periods, as we discover deeper and deeper connections with our own love and truth.

The practice: love yourself through everything you are experiencing.

Destruction of old identities, coping mechanisms, and avoidance techniques is not comfortable! Revolution is messy! Don’t shame yourself or your process. Learn to really TRUST your messy, confused, pissed off, lonely, and angry. They are showing you things, primarily where to show up for yourself more honestly, and wholeheartedly.

This is the only way. To accept and love it all. And through your non resistance comes peace and clearings, and more profound levels of love and connection with yourself.

The truth is you have to fall off track a few times to realize where you want to be; you have to be so sick of your own shit that you become willing to do the uncomfortable work.

No one said this path was easy. If it was, everyone would do it.

All Love,

Megyn

You have to fall of track a few times. visit www.megynblanchard.com for a free self love e course

SAY YES TO UNCOMMON TRUTHS, LESS WOO-WOO, AND MORE HUMAN!

Really it's all about experiencing as much joy, trust and love as we possibly can, while still being fully in our lives. My promise, is to give you thoughtful, practical and unconventional advice.

How to trust when things aren’t happening fast enough.

How to trust when things aren’t happening fast enough.

 

In case you didn’t know, I’m ancient years old, (37.5 rockin’ years on this planet ) and have been single for some time now: 2 years, 8 months, and 17 days at the moment this post was written. And to be brutally honest, I’ve spent more time out of relationship than I’ve been in a relationship in this lifetime.

I do desire magnificent partnership. . . I think life just had other plans for me.

I’ve certainly made an effort. I promise I am not hiding in my house writing change-your-life-posts all day. I’ve said yes to some dates I probably should have said no to (I love how hind sight is like, “yup, your intuition is on fire girrl”). I’ve done some internet dating, once, maybe twice, but, NEV. ER. A. GAIN.

I’m open. I make time. But, I never push. 

In fact, I so deeply trust that I’ll KNOW, and that it WILL happen when the time is right for both of us, that I just keep enjoying the hell out of cultivating the deepest, most trusting, relationship I can have with myself, and then watching how that permeates into loving friendships and circumstances in my life NOW.

But, I am human.

There have been a few times over the last two years where I have said to the Universe: I’m ready already. I’ve done the inner work. I just want to feel my love in action with another human being.

And then Life laughs at me again: there is more to let go of, there is more to surrender, there are more depths of taking care of me that are being explored.

So last year I made a deal with the Universe. Did you know you can make those?. I said “my magnificent partner is going to have to freaking fall out of the freaking sky, because this making-it-happen-dating-stuff feels gross!

The ironic thing was, after that deal, I had more dates with men that I more deeply resonated with, and quite literally they were freaking falling out of the freaking sky.

Even when my mind wanted to fit them into a box, I never pushed. Each one got closer to a soulful match. Each one showed me the Universe is way more creative than I am. Each one felt like more cosmic sorting and affirmation: trust yourself, then just show up.

I know it’s hard when you desire something; when you are ready for what you want to happen faster.

It can feel like the voids and spaciousness are just there for your personal torture. And, damn-it, you’ve put in the work.

It almost seems like a test: “Can I surrender? Align? Live in integrity more than I already am?”

Yes. The answer is yes.

Because if it’s not happening, most likely you aren’t ready, or you need to trust that the physical world takes a little bit of time to bring stuff together, because. . . HELLO! matter is dense, and there are more lives than just yours involved here.

Aside from learning more patience and surrender, check in, make sure you aren’t desperate attached to said think happening.

Am I truly ready? Am I truly happy without it? Do I really feel I deserve said thing? Can I let go of it happening the way I want it too?”

The circumstance, or status, or relationship can not be what we derive our wholeness and happiness from – that power can only be found deeply within.

I won’t ever give up my deepest heart’s desires, and you don’t have to either, but there is always more perfection, love, and truth to find in the present moment.

When we fall in love with our lives now we are much more open, receptive and magnetic to the highest YES in our life to occur, as opposed to grasping through wounding, or chasing through desperation, or manipulating without heart.

Trust the beautiful mystery of things unfolding and find more compassion and love for your fears. Keep asking: “How do I surrender more? Show me what I need to see? I’m here with my eyes, ears, and heart wide open.”

Dedicate your life to the delicate balance between allowing, receiving and putting one foot in front of the other, then watch what miracles start to occur. They do start to occur.

Learn to trust yourself and your life.

Witness.

Love.

Show up for the process of your unfolding.

And be hopelessly devoted to the purest desire you have: to love yourself more from within.

You are the one you’ve been waiting for.

 

defensive side-note: When I was in my late twenties (when dating really starts to count) I was in survival mode with a host of medical issues and could have cared less about dating. Then my thirties come around, and half of the people I knew who married in their early twenties were getting divorced, I was grateful that I had waited. I have had three significant relationships in this lifetime, one of them when I was 19 and didn’t know anything about relationship. The next one was abusive and showed me my blind spots and where I needed to heal to prepare for true union. The other one only lasted 8 weeks because in his words “he wasn’t ready to put his big-boy pants on.” I was grateful for his honesty, but more grateful for the opportunity to see how I had changed in romantic relationships.

I don’t make lists of “need to haves” or manifesting boards for my love life. I am absolutely humbled and in awe by the selection of men whose path’s I’ve crossed, and I am excited to see what the next one looks like.

 

All Love. All Truth.

Megyn

in between goals and all the things we are waiting on

 

Megyn Blanchard

Megyn Blanchard

Truth teller, Spiritual myth buster, Inner Relationship coach

My commitment is to be as human with you, as is humanly possible over the internet while I break down overly simplistic, reductive, self-help and spiritual teachings. Join me for monthly updates, stock my Instagram meanderings, and get access to the Wholehuman™ tribe, a bad ass, non-new-age, private Facebook group where we talk about real life self-love, self-awareness, and self-trust.

JOIN THE TRIBE

Uncommon, sometimes unpopular truths on relationships, spirituality, and self-love + FREE access to the private #Wholehuman Tribe, a soulful support group where you can come to share and relate as you deepen your journey into self-trust, self-knowing and more heart based living.

The Paradox Of Letting Go — You Receive More

The Paradox Of Letting Go — You Receive More

 

The paradox of letting go, is you receive more.

Let go of outcomes. Surrender to the present moment. Stop thinking so much, worrying so much, and just live in the spaciousness of your heart and truth, and the ever-unfolding now.

The ever-unfolding now? What the hell does that mean?

As a logical, type A, over-achiever, this used to piss me off. It also seemed counter-intuitive. If I took my hands off the wheel of life I might be whisked away in the tide of failure land or amount to being mediocre at best.

You mean I don’t have to plot out every twist and turn? I shouldn’t worry about my future; try to at least guarantee my success?”

No, actually you don’t.

When I was in a twelve-step program there is a step which states: “We became willing to turn our lives and will over to the care of God as we understand him.” I found myself a tad resistant.

First of all, I’m spiritual, not religious. I believe in the end we will find we’ve been calling on the same source of Love, and turning my will over sounded like some proselytizing rhetoric I’d heard uttered before in the same sentence as hatred.

Second, I came from the mindset that everything I did mattered. I was a plan it out, goal-oriented kind of gal.

I was asked to chart out all the instances in my life, good or bad, that had been beneficial; that had been life-altering in a way that I couldn’t plan for. Times when the miracles unfolding could never have been of my own doing; when God or higher knowing was doing for me what I couldn’t do for myself. The list was long – and is forever growing.

.

Which brings us back to the present moment. Letting go is about turning over your will, your ego, your spoiled and scared five-year-old representative who wants everything now, set in stone, guaranteed, and his own way.

Letting go is about being honest and responsible with the heart-centered self that speaks to you through feelings, guiding you one step at a time towards your highest path; that says this is harmful, this is fearful, this is not in service to LOVE.

Letting go is powerfully trusting in the present moment, which allows for the whispers of your heart to be your guide and compass.

It is not passive, rather it’s receptive, in that it asks the Universe, God, or whatever loving energy you choose uses you as a vehicle in service to the greatest good.

It signifies that you trust in a Love greater than your limited understanding and are willing to have faith in the unfolding; that you will be given great gifts, including the next step if you endeavor to listen earnestly to your heart.

If we are willing to open our eyes, unplug our ears and open our hands to both receiving and giving; if we can show up, choosing deeper levels of love in all circumstances, we will receive everything we need to awaken plus so much more.

We do not change the Divine Laws when we plow forward, head-strong, chasing and clinging to people and structures out of fear.

We do exercise our power when we choose to listen; when we discern what the next move should be in the moment.

Your Heart and Soul want to co-create with you – listen, they are patiently calling you.

I love hearing from you, comment below or share if you think this will help someone.

All Love,

Meg

LIving in your truth is less about making shit happen and more about letting shit go.

Save

Megyn Blanchard

Megyn Blanchard

Truth teller, Spiritual myth buster, Inner Relationship coach

My commitment is to be as human with you as is humanly possible, over the internet as I breakdown overly simplistic, reductive, self-help, and empowerment teachings. Join me for monthly updates, stock my social meanderings, and come be a part of the most bad ass, non-new-agey, real-life, private Facebook group as I give weekly sermons on realtionships, self-love, and self-awareness. I believe in original goodness, the simplicity and clarity of truth, the liberation of personal respsonsibility, and the endless healing of love. I can’t wait to see you.

Pin It on Pinterest