The difference between fear and resistance: How to make regret free decisions
There is a fork in the road. You are presented with a choice. Life delivers yet another opportunity. You know it’s time to decide. . .
Should you say yes? Email back? Forge ahead? Remain open? Repair? Mend or re-commit?
We all want easy, regret free decisions and a certain level of knowing that we’ve chosen the highest path.
It’s time to go deep. Listen.
Does it feel open? Light? Calm? Warm? Loving?
Or does something feel like chasing? Grasping? Settling?
Does it feel closed off? Sticky? Icky? Contracted or like pushing?
Does it feel inviting, effortless, soft, deep?
Notice, when trying to make a decision, something like fear usually comes up.
Don’t be afraid of fear. Fear and resistance are normal and healthy. We just have to be able to discern one from the other.
Fear and resistance are confusing. I know. I got the two mixed up a lot in my past, especially before I addressed the deep, internal beliefs that I wasn’t supported by Life; that I would be abandoned if I didn’t show up perfectly. Which is insanity. Your only job is to endeavor to show up for yourself more fully, compassionately, honestly and patiently. Just the simple act of trying to listen to your inner knowing, is a huge step in the Light direction.
Quick lesson: Fear, oh-so-totally normal when you are pushing your edge. When you are stepping into something bigger; healthy anxiety when growth is invited in.
Resistance – tricky close cousin to fear. More like an intuitive holding back. Little whispers: “This isn’t for you. This is just a distraction. This is not your door.”
Resistance, more often than not, is a good indicator that you should not muscle through. It’s like a blessing disguised as procrastination. Resistance is your spiritual wing-man.
So I call on my inner knowing and say leave the analyzing for another time.
Try to avoid calling all your friends, painful late night rumination, and predicting outcomes – none of it matters.
None of it is anything but the illusion of control, which we don’t really have.
This is worth reiterating. Control and predictable outcomes – are only an illusion.
I promise, life laughs at me every time I think I have something figured out.
In order to continue making choices that carry us down an ever expanding, nourishing, loving path you have to go within – below the mind and into the body.
What does this feel like? Without any thoughts attached? What does my body, inner knowing, highest self want me to know?
I always know when I am ignoring my intuition because it causes mind racing, the need for constant validation, and outside approval. It feels stressful.
When I go with my internal nudges, that don’t always make sense, it feels like relief; like a two ton weight has been lifted off my back. It feels freeing.
I still may never have the exact meaning, purpose or outcome exactly right. It’s okay, I’m not supposed to. I still may feel some discomfort, especially if there is another soul involved, but I will feel relief in my body.
This is about letting go and trusting that a part of me, my higher self that speaks to me through feelings and intuition is leading me somewhere more in alignment, and has higher possibilities.
And this way, I am working with my soul and not against it – and this always brings more and more abundant and nourishing opportunities.
So don’t make it more complicated than it has to be.
All Love. All Truth.
Truth teller, Spiritual myth buster, Inner Relationship coachMy commitment is to be as human with you as is humanly possible, over the internet as I breakdown overly simplistic, reductive, self-help, and empowerment teachings. Join me for monthly updates, stock my social meanderings, and come be a part of the most bad ass, non-new-agey, real-life, private Facebook group as I give weekly sermons on realtionships, self-love, and self-awareness. I believe in original goodness, the simplicity and clarity of truth, the liberation of personal respsonsibility, and the endless healing of love. I can’t wait to see you.